Castle Conversations
by Wendy Scott
Summary: Three conversations or missing scenes - you decide. Maybe the writers wrote these but they had to be cut; either way all these are purely my take on how I see the relationships, I'm just playing in Andrew Marlowe and Rob Bowman's sandbox for this brief time. Of course reviews are gratefully received.
1. Chapter 1

The smell of freshly brewed coffee filled the nose of Martha Rogers as she opened the door of her son's loft. "Richard, darling, how did you know?" she exclaimed as she walked to the breakfast bar depositing her bags on the surface.

Richard Castle turned to look at her, bringing sipping the hot beverage, "know what?" He looked at his mother, eyes wide in innocence.

"Coffee, kiddo, and pronto – it's a jungle out there!" Martha gave a dramatic flourish.

Castle poured a second cup and handed it to his mother saying, "tough hours in Bloomingdales, Mother?"

Martha accepted the cup, "You may mock, Richard." She sipped and sighed, "This is good." She looked at her son, "You're in a good mood. Detective Beckett involve you in a gruesome murder while I was out?" Martha drank again from her cup.

"Alas not; the good people of Manhattan are not playing today. Just congratulating myself on handling Alexis's boyfriend situation pretty well, again." Castle sipped from his cup with a self-satisfied grin.

"Oh, Richard, you're handling this as well as you handled Alexis's first period!"

"I did handle that well!" Castle's voice rose in indignation. "Alexis explained all the leaflets to me and translated that trip to the OB-GYN…"

"So that wasn't you waking me up in the early hours panicking before running to the nearest all-night Walgrave?" Martha looked pointedly at Castle, eyebrow raised and sipping her coffee.

"Admittedly I wasn't exactly prepared, Mother; it took me by surprise and I didn't want her to be alone …" Castle faltered. "I made sure she had a hot-water bottle before I left." He finished lamely.

Martha reached out and patted Castle's hand, "She's a long way from being walked down the aisle yet" and drained her cup.

Caste nodded while his mother looked at her watch, exclaimed at the time, gathered her belongings and walked to the loft's stairs. "Chet again?" he asked while drinking the last of his coffee.

"He's making me laugh and I'm enjoying his company."

"When you bring him home, I'm not going to call him "dad", Mother!" Castle shouted from the kitchen.

"Shouldn't you be writing?" came the retort from the second floor.


	2. Chapter 2

Richard Castle looked at the FBI operative in stunned silence. Then, he found his voice, "Paris?" The operative nodded his affirmative. Castle swallowed and then said quietly, "I'm sorry; can … can you excuse me?" He moved towards his mother and led her away from the agents and their equipment currently in his living room. They entered his office; Castle's mouth was in a tight line as he said one word while he closed the door, "Meredith."

Martha Rogers put her hands on her son's arm in an effort to calm him, "You don't know if she's still in Paris; she could be anywhere now, Richard. " She waved a hand in the air, "That woman does have the biggest flair for the dramatic I have ever known, and I've known a few, but even I have a problem thinking she'd go this far."

"She's done it before," Castle looked to his cell and stabbed the screen bringing up the personal number for his first wife. He held it to his ear as the call was routed through satellites and cables. He started to hear the call ring. "It's a non-American tone," he announced, his voice tight, waiting to be answered. He then heard Meredith's outgoing voicemail. He ended the call.

Martha appealed to her son's logic, "Richard, think! Whoever did this spent a lot of money to carry this out. I'll not deny that she has a strange way of showing her love for Alexis, but would she really spend that kind of money? And what would be the point?"

Castle redialled, "I don't care, Mother, but if she has organised this; I'm dragging her through every court I can to get her out of our lives forever!" The voicemail message answered again.

Martha raised her eyes to the ceiling briefly, before watching her son dial a third time, "I'm with you on that one, kiddo; but it's not your decision anymore," she said gently. "That is going to be for Alexis to decide when we find her and bring her home."

Castle had the phone to his ear and was about to reply to his mother when a groggy voice said, "Hmm, who are you and how did you get this number?"

"Meredith, it's me, Rick."

"Kitten, have you any idea what the time is –"

Castle interrupted, "I don't care – are you in Paris?" He paced the office trying to keep from shouting; he most definitely did not want to attract the FBI to this conversation.

"Oh, Rick; are you treating Kate to a romantic weekend in Paris? It would be divine to see you both; she would adore the shopping and there's this spa - you will be very happy at the result. Oh," Meredith stopped, "You are bringing Kate, aren't you?"

"Please, just answer the question, Meredith, are you in Paris?" Castle couldn't keep the urgency out of his voice.

"No, I'm in St Tropez," Martha could hear her former daughter-in-law's tone change – she had caught the urgency. "What's going on, Rick? Why are you calling me at three o'clock in the morning?"

Castle sank into his chair behind his desk. He'd wanted Meredith to be behind this, he wanted to know that his little girl was safe, he wanted to be able to have someone who he could scream and shout at and threaten; instead his first wife's response felled him, "Alexis", he faltered.

"Oh, how marvellous! My baby's in Paris! You didn't have to wake me, Kitten, and be so dramatic, you could have just left a voicemail and I'll get her down here with me."

Castle's eyes widened at his mother who just shrugged at Meredith's response. He said quietly, "Meredith, Alexis hasn't just "gone" to Paris. She's been kidnapped."

There was silence for what felt like an eternity. "Did you hear me," Castle asked.

"I … I heard you," Meredith replied, now fully awake. "How?"

Briefly Castle started to tell what happened and then he was interrupted by his first wife, "You thought I did it; that's why you called," her voice was harsh.

"You've done it before!"

"I was with her. We went together, Rick!" Meredith was now shouting, "Alexis made me call you to tell you! I'm hurt that you thought I'd do this. How do you know she's in Paris? What's happening now? Do I need to return to Manhattan?"

Castle filled in details and when he finished, Meredith simply said, "you and Kate have everything covered. There's nothing I can do, is there?" Her voice was hollow.

"Not really, no"

"Would you have called me if I wasn't here?" she asked directly. Followed by, "Are you coming to Paris?"

Castle looked at his mother and said quietly, "I would have called when there was more to tell you. I don't know what to do, Meredith. The FBI may say no."

Meredith snorted, "Since when has anyone saying "no" to you actually stopped you? It's our baby, Kitten."

"I know," Castle's voice broke as tears threatened to spill down his face.

"Promise me you'll call me if you go? When you find her, I want to see her before you return to Manhattan! Promise me, Rick!"

Rick nodded and said, "I promise." He pressed the screen and ended the call.

Martha reached out as her son crumbled.


	3. Chapter 3

The closed door in front of him felt like a guillotine had just cut his life in half. He stood there not knowing what to do – stay or walk away? His mind was blank with shock. Where was his daughter? What had the young woman on the other side of the door done with her? How had all this become his fault?

A sudden red mist descended and all he wanted to do was pound on the door until it opened or the police dragged him away. Richard Castle raised his fist and then stopped as the word "police" permeated through the anger and settled into the image of his fiancée and the realisation of how it would embarrass her professionally. He lowered his arm and wiped the tears that were gathering in his eyes. He and Alexis had always been a team – always together facing the world. This was the enduring legacy of his failed marriage to Meredith – this "unbreakable" bond and he never really thought that Alexis would put another man over him. Yes, he had considered this scenario, but he never thought the day would ever come, but here it is and it hurt; he felt like his daughter had taken a machete to his heart.

Castle stared blindly at the closed door and involuntarily went to rap on the door, but stopped again. He wondered if eyes were watching him through the door of the neighbours and what a dejected sight he must make.

He turned away from the apartment and walked slowly back to the stairs. Of course he hoped that the door would fling open and his little girl would run after him crying, saying how sorry she is, that she's made a huge mistake and that it would only take her 10 minutes to throw her belongings together, write Pi a note and come back home with him. He reached the stairs and nothing. Castle arrived at the first landing, still nothing. His imagination told him that Pi was physically barring Alexis from leaving the apartment and he nearly flew back to the apartment determined to kick in the door … He kept walking until he reached street level.

The evening air was slightly cool and Castle breathed it in deeply not sure of what he was trying to achieve. Now what? Kate treated this as if it was a rite of passage of being a father; his logical side acknowledged there was a truth in that – God, what a time to be logical and rational!

Home – cab – immediate problem. Castle started to scan the traffic for the yellow light that will take him away from this. He knew that his mother would tell him reproachfully that she told him to stay away; the fact that she hadn't yet called his cell could only mean that she and Alexis were talking about it or, even worse, not talking at all. He genuinely wasn't sure which scenario would be worse. Would Kate side with him, whined his brain. So far, Kate had made it known that naturally she supported him, but she and Mother had bandied together, choosing to encourage him and Alexis to find their own resolution. No, no "sides", but he was confident that she would understand why he went.

Finally, a yellow light heeded his hail and he was on his way home. After asking the cab driver to lower the volume on the radio, Castle called Kate.

"Hey Castle – are you on your way home?"

"How did you know?"

"You weren't here when I arrived and Martha is trying to make Alexis understand that you love her and she shouldn't stay angry at you."

"You know, then?" even to Castle, his voice sounded wounded.

"It was probably just too soon."

"What if I give her space and lose her? When Meredith and I were working out our divorce, I was so scared that my custody bid would be laughed out of court; I never let Alexis out of my sight. I even changed gyms and trainers about five times until I found one that really accepted her being around instead of just trying to placate my "celebrity". "

"Hash tag: first world problems?" Kate teased him gently. "She's finding her own way and she's not leaving you."

Castle paused, "I made everything about her, Kate. Tried to protect her from "Richard Castle – famous author."

"You've been almost a permanent Page Six feature –"

Castle looked at the brightly lit Manhattan advertising billboards in the stop-start traffic; one campaign used three models that he separately "dated" once. He sighed imperceptibly, "I've explained most of those are set up through publicists –"

"You have a meal and leave separately via the back of the restaurant," Kate finished.

"I've never denied to you that a fair number of the dinners led to sex or more, Kate, but I was leaving in the early hours and always made sure that I was home by the time Alexis was getting up for school. Some of my "dates" laughed at me or were just dismissive; some of them didn't think I could hear them on the 'phone to their people almost shouting that they weren't briefed or didn't know I had a daughter and how were they to deal with it. I developed "rules" fairly quickly that Paula had to pass on if she was approached."

"You had dating rules?" Kate sounded incredulous. "These women went along with that?" This was something he never spoke of before.

"They wanted the publicity; of course they did. It's a game. We both got something out of it. I'm not exactly proud about it," Castle paused again; this was a strange thing to even attempt to explain. "I'd never stay the whole night. I wouldn't be photographed leaving and if we wanted to hook up again, it must be a weekday and only between 10:30am to 14:30pm so I could always take Alexis to and from school. If we both liked each other, then maybe we'd "bump" into each other while at a Hamptons party or something when Alexis was with her mother."

"Strict."

"Had to be. Kate, you're the first woman since Gina where I've not had to enforce them. I never had to even think about them with you." There was a silence filled with beeping traffic. "I remodelled my life to make sure she always came first," Castle finished softly.

"Alexis will always love you and need you, Castle. Like all of us, we don't see it at the time, but she'll come round. Martha will not let a rift get so big neither of you can close it," Beckett smiled at her fiancé's insecurity. "And I have a lot of faith in her ability to bang both your heads together if it EVER comes to that."

"My mother's pretty wonderful, isn't she?"

"The best, Castle."

"You won't tell her I said that will you?"

"I've got you on speakerphone."


	4. Chapter 4

The drive back to the Twelfth was oddly quiet but the conversation in Kate Beckett's head revolved around her fiancé's hurtful, "you said no more secrets. You said you would tell me everything. Why didn't you tell me?"

She glanced over to Richard Castle in the passenger seat – he was looking at the passing billboards.

She couldn't stand the silence any longer, "I'm sorry. Are you angry?"

Her words brought Castle from his sojourn and he looked at her, "For what?"

Beckett glanced at him briefly before returning to the traffic in front of her, "the modelling …"

He didn't answer her, his gaze had returned to the advertising. Finally, he said quietly, "One of those could have been you. You could have been world famous."

"I chose to do something more worthwhile with my life. "

"Only because it became your coping mechanism," Castle looked at her.

Beckett felt an angry rise and she glanced at him. The tone of his voice and body language wasn't one of challenge as it may have been a couple of years ago, but a purely matter-of-fact statement.

Her eyes returned to the traffic and slowed for a stop sign. She had to concede that he was right, "I decided that I wanted the Harley and my parents had made it abundantly clear that if I wanted it, then I had to pay for it."

"I think Mother would have drawn the line at that too."

"Really? I've always got the impression that you became a master guilt manipulator and Martha never got to the point where she could deny you anything," from the corner of her eye, Kate saw Castle shrug.

"She's put up a good fight on occasion. There was this time –" he started.

"Anyhow," interrupted Becket. "I was shopping with friends on 5th Avenue one Saturday and got spotted. I was 17 and knew that modelling paid considerably more than a proper job and I really wanted that bike. The short story is that the agency put me on their books. My first job was in Jersey."

"Were you dressed as a showgirl for a casino ad?" there was hope in Castle's voice.

Beckett laughed, "no." Their eyes contacted briefly, "I'm sorry to tell you Castle, but even advertisers for the most mundane and unmentionable items want pretty people to photograph."

"Pretty people - why, Detective Beckett, is that a hint of ego I'm hearing?" he teased.

Beckett scrunched up her nose with the memory, "if you must know the assignment was for a fertilizer manufacturer. The place stank to high Heaven."

"I can't see Matilda King outside of Manhattan, let alone at a fertilizer factory."

"Matilda – no; no, that wasn't where I met her." Beckett continued, "There was some small assignments, and being the age I was, I loved the attention, hair, make-up, clothes. Some of the personalities left a lot to be desired though."

"Money?" asked Castle

Beckett nodded, "Even as a "nobody", I was earning considerably more than my friends who were waitressing. I did feel guilty, but I also wanted something more expensive than them. And, on the rare occasions I was allowed to keep an item of clothing or make-up – I shared." Kate laughed.

"So where does Matilda King fit into this story?"

"I got a panicky call – a shoot needed a replacement as the booked girl had been partying the night before and was a mess. I was the only one they could contact before 9 am." Kate looked sideways at her fiancé, "Who knows the girl may have been out with you," she said grinning.

"I would never," he began indignantly. Then stopped, did a year calculation mentally, and said, "Yeah, I may have."

"Matilda was overseeing and was also the principal stylist; I didn't know it was for Modern Fashion. I got there as quickly as possible, which was unusual, so I was already in hair and make-up when she arrived. When she saw me, she went absolutely ballistic at her PA –"

"So, she rode them hard, even then?

"Everything just stopped while she shouted and screamed. I thought she was going to come over and rip my false eyelashes off. Or have a heart attack. I had never seen anyone be that angry before; I was terrified!"

Castle decided to make a mental note to record Paula the next time she was in full flow so he could show it to Kate for a comparison. "What was the problem?"

"Not only did she not know about the replacement, she hadn't cleared me. That's it, but it was enough," Kate shrugged. "So, the commotion brought in Marco who just waited for Matilda to take a breath and said that as I was already made-up why doesn't he just take some test shots and winked at me – "

"The photographer? He winked at you? Did you -"

"Let's just say that the final few weeks before returning to school were fun."

"Cradle-snatcher!" Castle laughed.

"It wasn't just like that," replied Beckett indignantly. "There were galleries and jazz. Marco showed me the _avant-garde_. He didn't treat me like a schoolgirl."

"The Beckett Onion – I hope to be peeling those layers for many years to come," Castle leaned over and kissed his fiancée on the cheek making her blush.

"Obviously, Matilda liked what she saw and I did the shoot," Kate continued. "I was days away from returning to school, when she contacted me and offered the spread. I knew what the opportunity meant, but by then, I'd spent enough time with Marco in that world to see the dark side – women starving themselves to be girls, drugs to keep them going, being treated like a commodity, the jealousies and sheer fear; I couldn't live like that, so I said no. Besides I'd already achieved the my goal of getting the Harley."

Beckett stopped in line at a red light. She said softly, "I was never the ugly-ducking, Castle. I was always treated different, better. I managed to move between cliques in high school without belonging to any. I was always asked out when many of my friends longed just to be noticed. Until then, I never wondered why; I just accepted it but the time I spent in that circle showed me that it was exciting and alluring but deceptive and shallow." She looked at her fiancé and admitted, "I found the offer intoxicating, can't deny that. For a brief moment, I figured I could take a break from school to see where this would go – see Paris, Milan, London – for a couple of years and then return, with a financial nest egg. Maybe even pay for college rather than relying on mom and dad."

Castle held her gaze, just letting her talk. He had found her behaviour curious at the magazine and he welcomed this chance to find out why. That she was being so open with him now was a constant reminder to him of how far their relationship had progressed and continued to progress.

The car behind them beeped angrily – the lights had changed and Beckett refocused on the road. She drove in silence for a couple of blocks and then pulled into the curb and turned off the engine.

"Nest egg?" prompted Castle.

Kate turned to face him, took a breath and snorted, "Yes, "my financial nest egg". I thought it would be a way of showing mom and dad independence – it was a fun fantasy for all of a couple of minutes." She smiled at him sadly. "Anyway, when everything changed, I couldn't have continued with it."

"Did you tell them about the shoot?" asked Castle.

"Of course! Castle, I was 17, I told mom and dad almost everything. They were cool with the whole adventure; naturally they were worried about reputation of that world. But they gave me the freedom and trust to find out for myself. You know, I think mom and Martha would have got on really well comparing notes about us." Beckett smiled as Castle took her hand. "One of the women in mom's office read Modern Fashion religiously and showed it to her saying that she thought it looked like me." Beckett shrugged. She could see that her fiancé looked at her expectantly, "yes! Marco gave me a copy of the contact sheets."

"Good – you need to show them to me as soon as possible!" Castle studied her before saying, "It was really weird seeing you nervous around Matilda. Did you expect her to remember you?"

"No. She sees models come and go all the time, they're meat puppets to her; would never have thought that she would have remembered me."

"I'd say the very fact that you chose not to pursue the life made you stand out in a way you obviously didn't imagine," came the response.

"At the time, Castle, I remember her as being not too impressed of my decision and until I saw the issue, I did wonder if she would use the photo. It occurred to me that she ran it in the hope that I would see it – how I looked - change my mind and contact her."

Castle beamed at her and leaned in to kiss, "You're always the cover girl in our photos," he whispered lasciviously.


End file.
